Psychological abuse is real.
So is the path forward.

As featured in

Psychological Abuse and Its Effects on Physical and Mental Health

Equally Harmful

The effects of psychological abuse are just as detrimental as the effects of physical abuse.

Health conditions associated with psychological abuse and intimate partner violence include:

• Premature aging and mortality
• Post-traumatic stress disorder
• Depression
• Anxiety
• Insomnia
• Substance abuse
• Suicidal thoughts
• Childhood intellectual functioning impairment

No matter what we may have endured, our greatest gifts in life lie in our ability to love deeply, and to rise above the darkness more whole than broken.
-Avery Neal, PhD

The same guidance used in years of one-on-one clinical work, now available to you directly.

Psychological abuse is one of the most common and least-recognized forms of harm in relationships. It leaves no bruises. It builds slowly, in ordinary conversations, until the person living inside it begins to doubt her own memory, perception, and worth. Even those best positioned to see it, therapists, physicians, family, friends, were rarely trained to recognize it. That's what makes it so hard to name from inside.

This site is the resource I wished existed when I began working with women living through it. It's built on decades of clinical practice and current research on how psychological abuse operates, what it does to the mind and body, and how people actually recover. The courses, articles, podcast, books, and resources here serve two audiences: the person trying to make sense of her own relationship, and the one trying to make sense of someone else's.

Not sure if what you're living is abuse? Start with the quiz. If you already know, the courses and books walk you through recognition, rebuilding, and coming back to yourself.

A PLACE TO START

Not Sure If What You're Experiencing Is Abuse?

The quiz won't diagnose you. It will help you put language to what you've been feeling, so you can decide what to do next.

MY NEW BOOK IS HERE!

Loving You Shouldn't Be Hurting Me: Psychological Abuse and Its Effects on Physical and Mental Health

Nearly half of women in the United States have experienced psychological aggression from a partner. It's the invisible cruelty underneath almost every other form of mistreatment, and clinically, it's often the hardest to recover from.

I wrote this book for anyone still trying to make sense of a relationship that hurt them, whether it's ongoing, long over, or rooted in something from childhood. If you've carried physical or mental health symptoms you couldn't quite explain, you'll find both validation here and a real roadmap back to yourself.

YOU ARE IN THE RIGHT PLACE

GET ON THE LIST

Real information on recognizing patterns, understanding what you're feeling, and finding steady ground.